Today is a very special day. Today is the Kentucky Derby! The Derby is an OK holiday, only celebrated in Kentucky (where I'm from) and it's a very big deal. Horsies run around and the first one to put their nose on a wire (except it's not a REAL wire. It's confusing) wins a lot of money and a blanket of roses. I love horsies, so this is a good holiday. The only problem is the humans don't really celebrate with food. They wear giant, bigger-than-Mister hats and drink something called a "mint julep." I don't know what it is, but Mommy says I'm not allowed to have it. There's also Derby pie, but Mom says I can't have that EITHER.
This is me with my family a few years ago. Great Grandma had never been to Kentucky, so we showed her Keeneland, a race track like the one for the Derby only Mom says it's more specialer.
The people also like to bet on which horsie will put their nose on a wire first. Mom says Mylute will win because he's gray. She also usually roots for the horse wearing #8 because the blankie is pink and that's her favorite color. This year, the #8 horsie is Goldencent, but Mommy won't actually bet on it because the coach of Daddy's rival school will get lots of money if he wins. In case you can't tell, betting is very scientific (NOT!). So Mom will probably root for Mylute because his jockey is a girl and she'd be the first girl jockey ever to win. And the Kentucky Derby is older than my mom! By the way, a jockey is a person that sits on top of the horsie and steers him and tells him to run fast!
This is the only reason I like the Derby: horsies!